The One Where I’m Apparently a “Grown-Up”

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Something odd has become apparent to me over the last several months. It seems that when you live on your own, have a full-time job and cook your own food… all while managing not to seriously injure or kill yourself or others; people begin to think of you as an “adult” of sorts. This is a foreign label to me, and the realization has dawned on me over a long period of time. Without further ado, please enjoy the following list.

Times I Have Bizarrely Realized I am Considered a Grown-Up (Complete with GIFs because I’m the 20-something variety of “grown-up” and it’s a Buzzfeed world)

  • At one of the first nights of Crossroads last year, when Doug instructed students to find their adult and I started looking for Dawn or Connie… as several girls ran up to me and stared expectantly.
  • When my old boss told me that I wouldn’t be able to take vacation days over the summer like I had been promised, and saying, “My dad is going to be really mad about this” did absolutely nothing.
  • The week I was sick last year and had to stumble around my apartment by myself to get my own water and crackers.
  • Every time my internet bill auto-deducts from my bank account
  • Every time my rent comes out of my bank account
  • Every time I go grocery shopping
  • Really, every time I have to spend a substantial amount of my money on something that I only vaguely realized cost substantial amounts of money.
  • When my best friend got MARRIED on Saturday and no one thought it was weird or that she was too young or asked us why a bunch of kids were playing dress-up in the park.
  • After that same wedding, when a little girl who was helping clean up asked me where she should put the bells. And I told her to ask an adult. And then we stared at each other in total confusion for a full 30 seconds before it dawned on me that I was, in fact, the adult in that situation.
  • The first time my mom called me to ask a cooking question
  • Whenever I have to clean my apartment
  • When I meet my friends’ parents, but my friends are high school students and I’m their youth worker, so the parents treat me like I’m THEIR peer. What?!
  • Last Christmas, when my favorite gift was a knife set and the only non-domestic thing I received was an iTunes card.
  • The time I talked about mangos with a total stranger in the produce section completely sincerely for at least 5 minutes. (Did you KNOW about the peeling a mango on a cup trick?!)
  • Anytime conversation un-ironically turns to politics and I’m expected to participate
  • Any and every time any and every thing happens to my car. Tonight it wouldn’t start after Roots. As I started to panic and figure out how to get home tonight and get a new car by morning, Jocie’s friend listened for an eighth of a second and said “oh, your battery’s dead! no big deal!” (spoiler alert: it started as he went to find his jumper cables).
  • In conjunction with the above, any and every time I step into any form of auto shop. “What kind of oil does your car need?” “Hang on, let me call my grandpa.”
  • Taxes
  • And finally: THE TIME THERE WAS A SPIDER IN MY APARTMENT AND I HAD TO EITHER (WO)MAN UP AND KILL IT MYSELF OR SURRENDER THE PROPERTY AND MOVE TO A NEW HOME BUT I DIDN’T HAVE ENOUGH TIME OR MONEY TO MOVE SO I HAD TO KILL IT.

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